I went back to the judo training recently, which was approved by the Judo Scotland in the form of outdoor practice. Specifically, last night was my fourth training since last week. This was something I hesitated to share with other people, especially my family. They might think this is a risky and even crazy behaviour. But I miss judo so much; it used to be the main part of my life before the Covid outbreak, even prior than my own research. I am not kidding because I practice judo more regular than my routine, and the antidote to deadline anxiety is to go for a judo practice for me, which could be a symptom of procrastination.
But going back to the judo training does not mean I do not worry about the Covid, even I always bring a facemask and a portable bottle of hand gel with me in the pocket of my coat. I do worry about my own health, possibilities of being transmitted by others or transmitting to others. And I was too coward to wear my facemask throughout the training and put on some hand gel in front of others after training. This is not only an ethical issue but a life-threatening problem. Still, the desire to practising judo, meeting my judo friends, being thrown or throwing people, enjoying the adrenaline and dopamine fill my whole body override all my worries, but slight feelings of guilt and unease came after every training. This is more whether I trust my judo friends or not; trust would not stop infectious diseases like Covid. And to be honest, I don't really know other aspects of my judo friends other than the judo training.
In addition, if someone shows symptoms of Covid or even got the test positive, will this person informs his or her previous contacts, or this person just silently disappears and quarantine oneself for two weeks in the best scenario. If this person tells his or her contacts about hie or her symptoms, he or she will cause cascades of panic and more isolations, but if the person does not tell, 'cause he or she might not be aware of any symptoms or the symptoms are irrelevant to Covid, then the transmission, if there is any, would never be known and never be traceable. I sometimes think if the Scottish government or the Judo Scotland ban all these kinds of physical contact practice, I would not need to deal with this kind of struggle. But I guess some of my judo friends might share similar thoughts with me that we don't think about that since we don't even know how long we can practice judo like this for the foreseeable increase number of Covid cases and stricter restrictions.
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